Colors Pleasures Dildo by NS Novelties

When it comes to texture, I’ve very picky. Whether it’s food or dildos, certain textures just don’t work for me. The textures on this dildo in particular.

Appearance

Screen Shot 2018-02-10 at 11.50.33 AMThe Colours Pleasures Dildo is almost a caricature of a penis. The popping veins are outlandish, there is a dramatic shift as the eye moves up from the shaft to the corona of the head. And then there is the colour itself. The blinding, eye-watering pink.

The balls are small. The kind of small that lets you know it’s time to decide where to aim, because the deep crevice of a urethra will soon explode in an orgasm of bright pink cum.

This is the kind of dildo that has never known the term ‘subtle.’

Material

The silicone is thick, grabby, and hard. This dildo would have provided a completely different experience, and probably a much better one, had it been dual density. But no. Instead it is firm and unforgiving. Usually I like that in my sex toys, but this is an exceptional case, considering the thin scribbles of texture. 

Cleaning

Cleaning this dildo is, in a word, impossible. This dildo will never really be clean. The map of veins holds on to gunk. The deep trench under the head has its own moat. The thick, soft silicone reaches out and grabs the dust from the air. Don’t even get me started on the cat hair.

More than anything, I wish this dildo could be washed like clothes in the washing machine. Toss it in for a quick cycle, let the colour bleed out, and then maybe I could stand to look at it for more than a few seconds at a time.

The Bad and The Ugly

Everything about this dildo is too sharp. The hard, prominent head, the popping veins, the neon headache of pink. The Colours dildo feels sharp, stabbing. The head is tooScreen Shot 2018-02-10 at 11.51.10 AM
defined, feeling like I’m making love to a kitchen knife. The thin, popping veins are distinctive to the point of pain.

The thick, soft silicone exacerbates this entire experience. It’s very grabby, and thus does not move smoothly. It grabs at my insides, wanting to make itself known. It consumes lubricant, not that using lubricant makes this experience any better.

A suction cup base hides behind the balls, suggesting that one can subject a partner to this experience. Because of the balls, the base needs to be folded in on itself in order to be put through the hole of one strap-on contraption or another.

Suffice it to say, this dildo will never again enter my vagina after this review. I vastly prefer large textures that hit my g-spot with wave after wave of pressure. The thin scribbles of veins on this toy are abrasive, painful, and relentless. This is the kind of dildo that you chop up and inspect for science, because you won’t miss it.

The Colours dildos come in all sorts of colors and sizes, including Pride. You can get one for $30-$65 from most retailers. I bought this toy, and based this article on my personal experiences.

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